Can I Be Mad at God About My Illness? 3 Ways to Know

"When I was first diagnosed with fibromyalgia, Ihealth, he had a justifiable reason to be mad at
actually felt relief," shares Cindy. "I had beenGod. He said, "Do I have any power to help
trying to find a reason for my pain and it finallymyself, now that success has been driven from
was acknowledged as being something physicalme?" (Job 6:13). Later in Job's life, however, God
not mental." Cindy goes on to explain, "It wasn'trestored his life and blessed him exponentially and
until months later that I started gettingthen he said, "Surely I spoke of things I did not
short-tempered and frustrated and I realized thatunderstand, things too wonderful to know" (Job
I was angry about the diagnosis. I was angry that42:3b). Job had to go through the anger stage in
I had to suffer and no one understood."order to come out on the other side with more
Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, a doctor in Switzerland,character and wisdom. And only through this was
wrote a life-changing book called, "On Death andhe able to experience the blessings God gave him
Dying" which describes the cycle of emotionalto their full extent.
stages that is often referred to as the grief cycle.2. Feeling angry is okay.
Anger is the third stage, following the shock stageGod gave us the ability to feel anger. There are
and the denial stage.many examples in the Bible where even He feels
When we are diagnosed with an illness, feelinganger. What does the Bible tell us about anger?
anger is the most natural reaction. Realizing ourOnce you begin to get in touch with these
dreams may be out of our control now that ourfeelings of anger, it may trigger every unfairness
body is redefining what is "normal" for us, can beand injustice that you are experiencing. We are
devastating.susceptible to becoming wrapped up in these
Recognizing these feelings and dealing with them isfeelings and remaining angry at the world. These
part of the mourning process. We all need to goare the feelings of anger that God warns us
through this process, and it comes at differentabout; as He knows that they can become too
times for each individual and at different levels atprominent in our life and take our focus off of
each stage of the illness. Ironically, the first yearHim.
of diagnosis may even be easier than the third- "For man's anger does not bring about the
year.righteous life that God desires" (James 1:20).
Says Krista, who lives with chronic fatigue- "Wise men turn away anger" (Proverbs
syndrome, "I know that my anger stages come- "A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise
and go. I have been angry at doctors, at God,man keeps himself under control" (Proverbs 29:11).
myself, my church, even my husband andIt is no secret that the God designed us with
daughter and other family members."anger as part of our natural human response to
One thing is definite: anger will come. For somenegative circumstances. Some people may remind
people it will be a mild irritation with everything inus that it takes anger to make positive changes.
life, and for others a flaring temper that doesn'tFor example, the acronym "MADD" explains
seem subside.rather well the emotions behind Mothers Against
"It is my observation," says Linda Noble Topf,Drunk Drivers. Topf writes, "We discover that
author of "You are Not Your Illness", "that theanger is first and foremost demand for change."
absence of anger in the face of a serious illnessIt's true, amazing changes have occurred in
suggests that we have already withdrawn fromhistory because of anger, such as the civil rights
life, that we have relinquished our passion forlaws. Having an
living, that we are resigned and emotionally numb.""I'm-not-going-to-take-it-any-more-attitude" can
When you are Christian it can feel shameful tocreate positive changes. It is when anger takes
even express that you have angry feelings. Tooover a life that we are in danger.
often Christians believe that their angry emotionsIn Amos 1:11, God says, "I will not turn back my
are sinful and something that those with a greatwrath... because his anger raged continually." God
deal of faith never experience. They even believeisn't upset because of the presence of anger, but
that those feelings they do have are not evenbecause the anger was continuous. God calls us to
quote "allowed." Have you ever experience someput our focus on Him and try to make a
of these feelings?difference that will bring glory to Him.
- If my faith in God is solid, I should trust that He3. Walk with God beside you and He will walk with
wants what is best for me. Doubting His hand inyou through your anger.
my circumstances to shows my lack of faith.David experienced this and wrote, "Though I walk
- If I tell other Christians about my angry feelings,in the midst of trouble, you preserve my life; you
and how frustrated I am with this disease, won'tstretch out your hand against the anger of my
they think I am weak in my walk with Christ?foes, with your right hand you save me." (Psalm
- I know it says, "wise men shouldn't anger" in the138:7). God is there when you need to feel angry
Bible. How can I, in good faith, express theand he wants to stretch out His hand against
emotions that I am feeling?your anger and protect you.
- I know that anger leads to bitterness. So if I"I'm still dealing with anger toward this illness, after
don't acknowledge these feelings I will be aeight years of being sick," shares a woman who
"better Christian" and I won't ever become bitterlives with fibromyalgia, Peggy says, "Each time I
about life.experience a new limitation, I get angry all over
All of these thoughts are normal, but that doesn'tagain. But as I learn to cope with living with
mean they're correct. By burying our anger andchronic fatigue syndrome and fibromyalgia, and
not acknowledging it, we prevent ourselves fromthe limitations it places on my activities, I expect
moving on to the next phase in the grief cycle,God's perfect grace. I pray that He will become
learning how to effectively manage our emotionsslow to anger, as I am depending on the
and our chronic illness.scripture, 'The Lord is compassionate and
Here are a few tips to help guide you through thegracious, slow to anger, abounding in love'" (Psalm
process of dealing with your anger:103:8).
1. Are you feeling angry? Acknowledge thisAnger is an emotion we will all encounter for the
emotion and then move on with life.rest of our lives. Perhaps the simplest of advice is
It is easy to believe if we bury our anger we willa scripture that I quote in my book, Why Can't I
become a stronger person. Topf recommends,Make People Understand? Discovering the
"Think of anger as a resource that you can learnValidation Those with Chronic Illness Seek and
to harness and refine for your own benefit." ByWhy" where I go through the mixed bag of
claiming your feelings you can reclaim youremotions, especially anger and bitterness. It is
personal identity and your true emotions aboutHosea 7:13b-14 in which God says, "I long to
the situation.redeem [you] but. . . [you] do not cry out to Me
The Bible tells us that Job got extremely angry,from [your] hearts, but wait upon [your] beds."
even cursing the day he was born. After muchInstead of curling up in bed wailing "Why me?
loss of loved ones, possessions, and finally his