| Patsy swallows her feelings and gets tired out | | | | Patsy is so tired she forgets things and puts her |
| Patsy spent her forty-fifth birthday with her | | | | family in danger |
| elderly mother who complained about the food | | | | Patsy began forgetting things. She was making |
| being cold and bland. Patsy bit her tongue and | | | | mistakes and getting easily distracted. She began |
| tried to make something more appetizing. Her | | | | to cry quietly in the car when she missed her |
| sister called to wish her a happy birthday, then | | | | turns, forgot to pick up her son from basketball |
| made excuses as to why she couldn't take care | | | | practice and left the stove on all day when she |
| of their mother next weekend. Patsy was | | | | ran out of the house in a hurry. The harder she |
| outraged that she was expected to be the dutiful | | | | tried to remember what jobs to do, when and in |
| child while her siblings got away with it. She | | | | what order, the more fatigued she got. It was |
| ground her teeth, stuffed the indignation and | | | | becoming very tough to concentrate fully on |
| continued with her chores. She was tired and | | | | keeping everything running smoothly. Her bones |
| didn't want to create family tensions. | | | | ached and her muscles just didn't want to move. |
| At the birthday dinner that evening Patsy heard | | | | She was worried about letting her family down. |
| Jasper and the kids fight. She was upset that the | | | | But she never said anything about her fears, her |
| family bickering never took a rest. She was hurt | | | | worries and her alarm about her errors and |
| that no one considered her feelings. She felt | | | | memory problems. |
| lonely, sad and unimportant at that moment. | | | | Trauma, stress and suppressing of emotions are |
| Fighting back tears, Patsy took a sip of water and | | | | factors in CFS |
| swallowed her feelings. She stepped in and made | | | | Patsy experienced childhood trauma, prolonged |
| the peace. Drained of energy and enthusiasm | | | | stress and experienced much psychological |
| Patsy pretended to enjoy herself when the cake | | | | distress. Research has detected links between |
| and candles arrived. | | | | these three factors and the likelihood of getting |
| Patsy's stuffed emotions erased her energy | | | | CFS in later adulthood. |
| Patsy was tired and achy the next day. She | | | | The Center for Disease Control reports on a |
| wished she could just put her body down and | | | | study published in 2006 that links stress and |
| walk away from it. She didn't want to shop and | | | | childhood trauma to later life Chronic Fatigue |
| make dinner. She didn't want to pick up the kids | | | | syndrome. The experience of marked and |
| from school. She didn't want to do the laundry or | | | | sustained psychological distress was found to be a |
| take the dog for a walk. If only she could stay in | | | | distinguishing factor in CFS sufferers as reported |
| bed and watch television, and never have to | | | | in a 1997 study by the Institutes of Health. A |
| worry about anyone or anything else. | | | | 2007 study also reported by the Institutes of |
| Patsy is exhausted but her family think she is | | | | health indicates that not being able to talk about |
| pretending | | | | your emotions (alexithymia) is often a marker of |
| Waking up feeling wiped out was familiar. This had | | | | CFS sufferers. |
| been going on for a few months. Her doctor gave | | | | Patsy finally deals with her emotions when her |
| her tonics, supplements and vitamins but nothing | | | | fatigue leads to serious mistakes |
| helped. Her blood work came back normal and no | | | | The weight of Patsy's stress, unacknowledged |
| hormonal imbalance was detected after a | | | | emotions and distress made her chronically |
| thorough panel of tests. Her family mocked her | | | | fatigued. It was so huge she buckled. The |
| tiredness feeling like she was putting it on. | | | | suppressed feelings overflowed into other areas, |
| A diagnosis of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS) | | | | affecting her memory, clarity of thinking and |
| Shames Patsy | | | | ability to make sound judgments. Basically Patsy |
| The diagnosis of chronic fatigue syndrome | | | | collapsed under the burden of undigested |
| stunned Patsy and her husband. How could she | | | | emotions. Alarm let her to therapy. She learned |
| have this condition for which there was no | | | | that feelings are normal and useful. She began to |
| physical cause? It just didn't make sense that her | | | | connect to all those experiences that had broken |
| body was suffering real exhaustion and lack of | | | | her heart. Her energy levels returned. As she |
| energy when every organ and system was | | | | found strength in expressing herself so her body |
| working efficiently. Patsy felt accused of | | | | regained it's strength and vigor. Patsy is learning |
| malingering. She felt ashamed to speak about her | | | | to talk about her feelings as she experiences |
| constant fatigue without having a medical reason | | | | them with her family and friends. There is a |
| for it. Unable to handle the implication that she | | | | feeling of lightness in her muscles and bones. She |
| was a bit 'screwed up' and weak, Patsy refused | | | | plays a round of golf every morning and is |
| to join a support group. She decided to struggle | | | | volunteering at her local preschool. |
| on and push past the exhaustion. | | | | Copyright, Jeanette Raymond, Ph.D. |