| When I work with clients who are seriously ill, one | | | | limiting beliefs. She told me that all she truly |
| of the strongest negative emotions they often | | | | wanted to do was relax yet she was scared of |
| feel around being ill is guilt. They feel guilty | | | | letting go of her current behaviour. She realised |
| because they can't work or do the things they | | | | that her routine of overloading herself and keeping |
| once did; guilty for needing care and support; | | | | busy was a way of maintaining control. She |
| guilty for resting, and guilty for not doing enough | | | | became afraid of letting go of this behaviour |
| in general. The challenge with this limiting belief is | | | | pattern in case it wasn't good for her. The most |
| that it influences our rest time. It can lead to us | | | | fascinating part of her dialogue was when she |
| dismissing our bodies' needs because there is just | | | | explained if she stopped "doing stuff" and getting |
| so much to do and we "should be doing more". | | | | things done, something bad would happen to her. I |
| We decide to soldier on instead. | | | | reframed this by suggesting that if she stopped |
| Whenever a client suggests she should be doing | | | | doing stuff, perhaps something good would |
| more, or she isn't doing enough, I like to introduce | | | | happen. Andrea understood this immediately, |
| the possibility that perhaps relaxing is enough. We | | | | realising I was implying that if she stopped |
| are unlikely to recover if we are preoccupied with | | | | 'soldiering on', perhaps her body could have an |
| berating ourselves for not having the energy to | | | | opportunity to heal. |
| clean the house, go to work, or socialise. It is so | | | | The following is some of the EFT I used with |
| important to listen to our bodies' messages and | | | | Andrea, and if this subject resonates with you, I |
| respond by taking some time to recuperate. | | | | thought it might be useful. |
| When I was housebound with Chronic Fatigue | | | | Start by tapping the two karate chop points (KC) |
| Syndrome, there were specific symptoms which | | | | together and repeat the following three times: |
| flared up when I had pushed myself too far. In | | | | "Even though for whatever reason, there's a part |
| the early days, pushing myself too far might have | | | | of me that doesn't want to let go of this guilt, |
| meant watching TV for half an hour, or showering | | | | there's a bigger part of me that wants to accept |
| and washing my hair. I soon learned that these | | | | myself and move on." |
| activities were too much for my body because | | | | The purpose of this is to clear any resistance |
| my leg muscles and knee joints would start | | | | from the subconscious mind. Once this is cleared, |
| aching, a migraine would start or I would feel | | | | we are ready to apply regular EFT on the issue |
| completely exhausted. At first, I was frustrated | | | | at hand. When we tap on our limiting beliefs, |
| and deeply disappointed in my body, so I ignored | | | | traumatic memories and pain, we shift our |
| the symptoms. This usually meant I would end up | | | | perspective, gently allowing our subconscious to |
| in bed for the rest of the day! I started to listen | | | | consider change. Once the subconscious realizes |
| to my body more and more. As soon as one of | | | | there is nothing to gain from holding on to the |
| the symptoms worsened, it was my cue to rest. | | | | problem, it is open to changing. |
| I strongly believe that adopting this protocol was | | | | Now tap the karate chop point on the other hand |
| one of the main reasons I recovered from this | | | | while saying the following: |
| debilitating disease relatively quickly. I chose to let | | | | "Even though I feel guilty for resting, I want to |
| go of the guilt I felt about taking time to | | | | accept myself anyway |
| meditate, do breathing exercises or sleep because | | | | Even though there's so much to do and I should |
| I realised in the long term, resting would facilitate | | | | be doing more, I accept who I am and how I'm |
| my recovery. | | | | feeling about this |
| Demanding, and sometimes overwhelming words, | | | | Even though if I rest, they might think I'm lazy, I |
| such as 'should', 'must' and 'ought' can be replaced | | | | deserve to accept all of me now." |
| with 'could': "I could be doing more, but right now, | | | | Now tap the following places while saying each of |
| relaxing is enough". If my clients feel resistant as | | | | the phrases below: |
| they regard this, it is very useful information for | | | | • top of head: I don't know who I'd be |
| me. There might be some negative self-talk | | | | • eyebrow: Being sick has become my |
| coming up, such as "I don't have time to relax!", "I | | | | identity |
| need to soldier on", or "relaxing is what lazy | | | | • side of eye: Everyone accepts me in this |
| people do". With powerful limiting beliefs such as | | | | role |
| these at work, the subconscious will not feel safe | | | | • under eye: and if I recover, they'll expect |
| enough to consider the possibility of resting and | | | | more of me |
| ultimately, healing. | | | | • under nose: I'll have to resume my |
| When I worked with Paul he said he was | | | | responsibilities |
| surrounded by so many things that needed doing | | | | • chin: and that's too much for me right now |
| and they were all shouting at him, demanding his | | | | • collarbone: I feel threatened by the |
| attention. He felt guilty if he rested, and likened | | | | possibility of changing |
| the way he felt to wearing a belt which was | | | | • under arm: I'm afraid to change |
| slowly tightening around his waist, preventing him | | | | • top of head: I want to enjoy the freedom |
| from taking a comfortable breath. As we used | | | | that whole health offers me |
| EFT on the negative emotions he felt, his | | | | • eyebrow: I want to make a commitment to |
| perspective altered quite considerably as he | | | | my healing |
| realised that by taking the opportunity to rest | | | | • side of eye: I deserve to feel safe enough |
| when he needed to, he would have even more | | | | to recover |
| energy to complete the tasks which surrounded | | | | • under eye: I don't have to feel obligated to |
| him. The sensation of the tightening belt dissipated | | | | change |
| and he was left feeling calm and confident. | | | | • under nose: I choose to feel curious about |
| Andrea told me she didn't deserve to take rest | | | | the possibility of changing |
| time because that would make her feel even | | | | • chin: and how exciting my life will be |
| more guilty about being ill. She told me she | | | | • collarbone: I'm starting to feel curious about |
| overloaded herself by constantly doing things and | | | | who I could be withoutthis illness |
| making sure she was busy. The majority of her | | | | • under arm: I deserve to change now |
| activities revolved around striving to make herself | | | | After you have tapped through this round, write |
| better. Somehow, she had developed the belief | | | | down how you're feeling and any new thoughts |
| that she had to keep on "doing something" in | | | | which have come up, then tap again, changing the |
| order to recover from her illness. She believed | | | | wording if you need to. Remember, the phrases |
| that if she wasn't doing something to "fix" her | | | | you use are simply a way of outwardly |
| health, she certainly didn't deserve any rest time. | | | | expressing how you're feeling. You don't need to |
| Using EFT, we tapped on all of these beliefs and | | | | be creative - just state what's on your mind. |
| Andrea began to realise that these were, indeed, | | | | |